2 Easy Ways to Kill Your Self Confidence

Apr 23, 2008

2 Easy Ways to Kill Your Self Confidence

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Easy! You’ve probably read tons of "how to build self-confidence" articles in blogs and dozens of "you can do it!" self-affirmations and scores of "make it happen today!" posts to last you a lifetime.

And generally, I adore these kinds of posts myself; positive attitudes and self-confidence can go light-years towards making one successful online.

Which, of course, is why I have to rock the apple cart, tip the bathtub, spread the peanut butter on the down side of the toast, fill up the car with water, shine up the trumpet with sandpaper, mix the coffee with carrot juice….in other words, present ideas from the other side of garden! With that, let me now ask you:

Do you give your self-confidence with these two killer stupidities?

1.) Before even trying, intoning to yourself, I cannot do this!

Not trying has one super result - you never run the risk of failure!

‘course, you never give yourself permission to succeed. But if you’re afraid of giving yourself the gift of failure (and hence, learning how to regroup, rebound and return), you’re doing yourself a wonderful favor by telling yourself, I cannot do this. After all, as Richard Bach says….argue enough for your limitations and sure enough…they’re yours.

2.) Apologize for existing.

I used to have this problem myself. After all, who the heck are you to want to run with the big dogs? How on earth can you even consider putting your sorry self next to those who are acknowledged masters and expect to both give and receive respect?

I finally conquered this by giving myself permission to acknowledge my superior gifts (we all have them, you know…you simply have to accept the fact you’re an extraordinary individual). It reminds me of the quote from Marianne Williamson:

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others…."

Powerful stuff, eh? Got problems with self confidence? Resources to help with that include:

Remember - when it comes right down to it, the only person upon whom you can count for success is youself. Kill your self confidence…and watch your dreams fall by the wayside. But nurture your self-confidence, and you’ll see your online success only increase and increase.

Hope you enjoy the above!

Owlbert

ps - speaking about self-confidence:

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(By the way, if you have any questions about the topics in this posting "2 Easy Ways to Kill Your Self Confidence", do comment below - I'll try to clarify any issues).

Barbara Ling and Owlbert

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